Life in Texas

We moved to Texas.

There was a great big dream that we pitched to everyone who told us we were crazy. "In Texas, the economy is a lot better, we can own a home and have a family. We know people out there, it will be great!"

Well, it sounds wonderful doesn't it? But alas, the road to "BIG DREAM" is bumpy. Husband and I are confident that it will still happen but the "when" part is a bit iffy.

The job husband came out here for didn't work out. about a month after I got here, they let him go. Turns out the economy is yucky all over the nation.

A home... I have found that my home is in heaven... and my earthly home is in my husband's arms. As for a house of our own, it will take finding a job. Really. Once we make an alright income- BAM! new home. Really. We talked with a home builder lady and found out that we can own a new home (built for us, I get to pick carpet and tile and paint...) for $500 down, and $950 a month. A new house for $118K. No joke. And don't me started on the Repo houses... $85K for a house we LOVE! Now, if only we had money...

Having a family is something we think about a lot. In certain times in life the only things that really get us through is our ability to dream. "What if?" *smile* We are both set on letting God build our family. When He sees it time to grow us into 3 (or 4) He will bless us with a baby. Until then, husband and I dream a lot and talk about how we want to raise said family. What our traditions will be etc.

I don't know what I was thinking when I told people that we "knew so many people" out here. Relationships that go unattended don't grow. Thankfully there is one relationship that has not only been salvageable, but has grown and is such a huge blessing. For a long time out here I was so upset that I didn't have friends. And somehow I lost my ability to make friends. So this on relationship has been a life saver! Someone to talk to, laugh with and cry with. God is amazing!

Life in Texas isn't at all what I thought it would be. It isn't easy. It isn't happy all the time. There are times when I get so mad that I gave up all I had in California. Times I cry hard knowing that I had a home and people knew they could come over.

But in this time of grieving, loss, heartache, and disappointment there is surfacing a peace, joy, determination and strength that I never knew I had. I am learning to be more grateful than ever before. learning to let others bless me, reach out to me and love on me. I am uncomfortable enough to learn. Brave enough to hold on. And excited to see what the future holds.

This is my new life in Texas.